LOSING ONESELF TO GAIN ONESELF

The theory of oneness with God is something that is not very appealing to Vaishnavas, in fact it is the one thing that they vehemently oppose. But the oneness I am talking is not about loosing our soul - it's about gaining it.

Losing oneself in any activity means to fully absorb ourselves into it or as they say, "to get into it fully". In the pages of the Srimad Bhagvatam there is mention of an Avadhoot Brahman who had 24 gurus. One of his guru was an arrow maker. This arrow maker was so absorbed in sharpening his arrow that he didn't even recognize the entourage of the King passing by. The Brahman learnt the quality of absorption from this arrow maker.

If there is one word that is of utmost importance in spiritual life - it is ABSORPTION. In order to truly experience happiness in spiritual life, we need to fully absorb ourselves into the practice - kind of forget our present identity. We identify with so many things that we are not - our various aspects and roles in this life. We identify so much with our present body and mind that we forget that our true identity is spiritual. At least while we do our daily sadhana especially our chanting of the holynames, we need to put aside all our so called designations in order to get maximum benefit from the process. Just like when we enter a temple we keep our footwear outside and enter, similarly when we enter into our spiritual practices we need to keep all the temporary ego designations aside and enter it with our true ego - as servants of God.

We all know that the Charam-sloka or the ultimate verse of the Bhagavad-Gita is - sarva dharman parityajya, mam ekam saranam vraja.....BG 18.66, wherein Lord Krishna pleads all of us to surrender all varieties religion and duty and surrender unto Him. Surrendering to Lord Krishna on a practical level actually means that while we chant His holynames, we keep all other duties aside to be fully available in body, mind and heart to recieve Him in His most merciful incarnation as the Holyname.

It is explained that when Lord Shiva closes his eyes to enter into his meditation on The Supreme Lord, he gets so absorbed in it that he opens his eyes only after 60000 years. He basically losses track of time, the world around and himself. We can't imitate great souls, that is clear but the minimum we can do is in deference to our chanting of our prescribed rounds we can put off both our external and internal worlds. Let everything wait and it has to wait because it's time to gain our immortal soul - our very self.

In summary, losing oneself to gain oneself means completely surrendering oneself to the process of Krishna consciousness and to give up the false self to gain our real self.

- Achyut Gopal Das